


By The Numbers

by Amarin_Rose



Category: Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Marvel Avengers Movies Universe, The Avengers (2012), The Avengers - All Fandoms
Genre: Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, F/M, Female Phil Coulson, Genderswap, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-24
Updated: 2012-09-24
Packaged: 2017-11-14 22:46:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 383
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/520299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amarin_Rose/pseuds/Amarin_Rose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One thing SHIELD agents should always be aware of when they are complaining about Agent Coulson, is where Agent Barton is. Because two things Clint has are Pippa's love, and the ability to get the drop on unsuspecting, smack-talking junior agents.</p>
            </blockquote>





	By The Numbers

Every time someone in SHIELD referred to Agent Coulson as the Ice Queen, Clint always wanted to correct them; she was an Ice **Princess**. After all, Pippa was the name of Princess Kate’s sister, so she was a princess by proxy, right?

Only, 1) No one ever referred to Phillipa Coulson as Pippa except for Clint (everyone else who had first name privileges called her Phil), 2) there was no such thing as ‘princess by proxy’ and 3) Pippa wasn’t actually all that icy once you got to know her.

Clint knew Pippa very well. Well enough that she 1), allowed him to get away with calling her Pippa (and actually liked it, but only when it was him), 2) had just rolled her eyes when Clint had told her his Ice Princess joke (though she had made him work through three weeks of backlogged sitrep forms before forgiving him for making her watch the Disney movie of the same name) and 3) allowed him to prank random junior agents that talked shit about her instead of arguing that she could take care of herself (and of course she could. But her way of dealing with the problem was assigning shitty stakeout details and extra paperwork. Clint got revenge in more creative ways.).

Clint did not know Pippa better than she knew herself, but she knew him better than he knew himself. And she loved him anyway. Which meant there was nothing he wouldn’t do for her – especially if it was something he enjoyed.

“Fire in the hole,” Clint muttered from his perch in the ventilation shafts as he dropped glitter-and-glycerin filled water balloons down on top of the three junior agents that had, just moments before, been jealously maligning his girlfriend’s awesomeness.

Splish! Splash! Sploosh!

Cries of shock, surprise and dismay reached his ears, followed by a long, drawn-out growl from Agent Quartermain and a panted, “Barton!” from Agent Carter.

Clint chuckled and monkeyed his way up towards the offices, and his regular Tuesday lunch date with Pippa. SHIELD agents, no matter how junior, should know better than to talk about Pippa like that where he could hear them (which, considering the vents ran through the entire hellicarrier, was pretty much everywhere.).

Pippa was, after all, his number one priority in life.

**Author's Note:**

> There's no nearly enough female!Phil fic out there, and this just came to me as I was ruminating on how Pippa is nickname for Phillipa.


End file.
